My friends sometimes do this too. My closest mate is a Sikh fellow with a very British accent, but when people annoy him beyond a certain point, he starts sounding like his father, and his father’s father with the strength of his Indian accent. He does it deliberately to be vexatious to people who are persistently vexatious to him. It’s unbelievably funny.

My grandfather takes a different route. He’s an incredibly smart, highly successful, genuinely brilliant man… and wow can he pretend not to be! I have seen him go slowly cross-eyed, develop a hunch and a waddle, and revert to single-syllable grunts, like some kind of tranquillised gorilla. Why would he do this? The person he was talking to was very very very annoying and drained my grandpa’s last thread of patience. Instead of internalising the aggravation, he just hands it back in the form of his slack-jawed village idiot act. I have only seen him do this twice in my 37 years of life, and both times I had to hide my face. Too funny for actual words. I might expire if he does it again.

My way of handling these people is most similar to my mom’s. She was also an absolute brainbox like her dad, and also incredibly accomplished, kind, and empathetic. Until you depleted her reserves of patience and then… she’d settle way down and get this “I pity you,” grin on, while kindly being as diabolically unhelpful as she could possibly be. If you were a bureaucrat enforcing some arbitrary script when a more helpful course of action would have taken less effort, she would break your spirit on a Friday afternoon. It would go like this…

Mom: “Please email me your banking details.”

Rep: “No, Ma’am, unfortunately I can’t do that for you.”

Mom: “Oh, I understand that dear, but I’d really like you to email me your banking details.”

Rep: “Unfortunately Ma’am that’s not our standard procedure. I can’t do that for you.”

Mom: “Oh, of course, I totally understand… but I’d really like you to email me your banking details.”

(Repeat for 2 - 5 minutes)

Rep: “Ma’am, I have explained that I can’t do that for you.”

Mom: “Oh, I know you have. However I’d really like you to email me your banking details.”

Rep: Big Sigh… “Okay ma’am is your email ____@gmail.com?”

Mom: “Yes! That’s wonderful, thank you, you’ve been sp helpful.”

She could obliterate someone’s petty resolve with polite repetition and a whole pocket full of loving pet-names. She would love and annoy you in equal measure. Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous.

I have inherited some of that, but not nearly enough of her inherent grace while doing it. Given more time, maybe I’ll become 10% as good at this as she was.

If you’re being a pain in the arris for little to no reason, beware…

Up with this we will not put.

So there I was, in the supermarket, minding my own business and attempting to purchase a rotisserie chicken. It was a lazy day, and if you judge me, at least make yourself a cup of tea first. Enter Irritable Ivan, who thinks he’s very big and imposing. He’s probably used to people doing what he wants.

Irritable Ivan points at the chicken in my hand and barks…

II: I need that chicken it’s the last one.

Me: (Distracted) No. (Checking shopping list)

II: I said I need that chicken.

Me: (Wandering off) No. (Looking for bread)

II: I’m talking do you. Fuck, don’t walk away from me when I’m…”

Me: (Wandering off) No. (Going towards the bread now)

II: What?? SHIT YOU!!! Fuck!! (Storms out of the store)

Now Ivan, if you’re reading this, you know I didn’t change the words of this interaction. You know you were a rude little numpty.

Do better, Irritable Ivan.

Do better.

😅

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Opportunities are always sniffing around your ankles, and this is how they stack. They tessellate... or something. Watch the fucking video on YouTube, or listen to the audio on any pod platform.

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There’s something terrible…

I really want you to pause and go beyond the obvious with this question. “Because I’ve done sporting,” is not your reason for staring a sports podcast. “Because I’ve healed my trauma,” is not your reason to start a mental health podcast. “Because I’ve been i politics,” is not your reason for starting a political podcast.

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There’s more to you than there is to you. Think deeper. Think more personally. Think hard, and be real. Your journey has absolutely peppered you with experiences that have led you to this point, now, today. Ruminate on those, and be brave. Some experiences will have been good, some will have been bad. Some may have been both. It’s often those middle places that stay with us the most. And you know what? That is where you’ll find your answers. In the wasteland. In the in-between. In the upside down. In The Other Place. In your personal purgatory, at times. Those are the moments that shape us most.

There’s more to you than there is to you…

There’s something terrible, something beautiful, and something terribly beautiful about this all, and that makes for incredible conversations. You have to let yourself out of the cage you’ve built to please others. Haven’t you been trying to do that all your life in one way or another? What parts of you are you throttling back on, so you can feel more normal?

Don’t do that. There’s another way. You’ll find it.

You can make a podcast like everyone else’s, get bored, lose enthusiasm, and never succeed.

Or you can do this deep dive work, figure out your why and make something that is unique, needed, and powerful. A legacy.

Up to you.

Get in touch if you need help at YVCreator.com

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We so badly want to be okay, to feel okay, to know that we will be okay, to know that our loved ones are safe, to feel secure about our next meal, our safety, and like we’re making some kind of progress in life. That’s a wonderful place to start. Those are positive, healthy, helpful things to want. So why do we run in the other direction every day?

Our society has figured out that negative input holds our attention far more effectively than positivity. You’ve heard of the Attention Economy, and the way that success is measured these days. It’s diminishing your life, and I want you to see it.

We are constantly being fed reasons to fear, new ways to distrust and the justifications for it. We are force-stuffed with reticence and we’re paralysed by it. We allow it because it’s been packaged for us as necessary for self defence. How will you defeat all these enemies if you aren’t constantly obsessing over their every move?

Mad-eye Moody liked to bark, “Constant Vigilance!” Doesn’t that sound exhausting though? I’ve lived that way for so long that it’s proving difficult to shift gears. Always on the look out, always on high alert, always scanning for threats… it’s stifling.

Why do we do this to ourselves when we can instead, learn to just… not.

The man pictured is Werner Streck, my father-in-law. He’s smarter than almost anyone I’ve met, and will deny it until you drop it. He has not had an easy life, and you’d never know it. At almost flipping 90, he’s healthy, active, witty, travelling, making time for his family, and like a mallard coming up from a dabble, he shakes away negativity like water off a duck’s back. He has an extensive array hard-won coping mechanisms and he uses them all the time. He doesn’t dissociate and wait for issues to abate. He handles things as they come, like the rest of us try to do. The difference is, he doesn’t allow himself to get bogged down to his frame over the difficulties, the challenges, the setbacks, and the hard times. He finds a reason to laugh, laughs at it, and smiles as he swings a bat at fate’s face.

My wife, Simmy Streck, is also a bloody good example of learning to let go. I get pretty stuck sometimes, and she reminds me, just by being, that I can just be too. Even when she’s overwhelmed, stressed out, in pain, or just having a bad day, she finds time to appreciate beauty, and to pause to look at it properly. Simmy’s a whole vibe. She’s beautiful, fierce, intelligent, successful, caring, kind, and insightful. She uses those skills and traits to notice the beauty and the charm in the world, the small moments of bliss, and anything she can get excited about. I am blessed to have her as an example in my life, and even more fortunate to have married someone like her.

My mom was something else. She truly lived, truly loved, and truly experienced what it is to be alive. She endured some horrific circumstances and always found a way to lead with love, and to encourage others to do the same. She could always find a reason to smile, something to laugh about, and something to look forward to. I can’t imagine where I would be in my life, if in life at all, without her encouragement, kindness, guidance, passion, peace, and purpose. Even now, after her passing, and even through the immense agony that life without her causes, she is guiding me, teaching me, and showing me that nothing is too big to douse the blazing spirit she instilled within me. I am eternally thankful, always connected, and forever honouring of this other-worldly woman.

I do not have all the answers, and I am not even sure I am succeeding at what I am suggesting here. All I know is that these 3 people are the most important teachers in my life, and that without them, I would never have learned these lessons. All I can suggest is that you pull inspiration from the people around you, and keep trying to tend towards the positive. It’s a rad trick to learn.

Restaurants want their authentic style and vibe to come through in their photos. Choosing a place to eat is about more than just the menu, after all. I wanted the photos to carry the spirit of the Frances bustle and show off the food and drinks on offer in an eye-catching way. You’ll notice the mini charcuterie board topping the wine glasses. It’s a fabulous way to showcase the quality of the fare, and to keep drinks safe at the same time. Inspired, and I love it.

Frances feels home-y. People almost forget where they are and become immersed in the people they’re with. That felt good to see. It’s real food for the soul to watch people just connecting with each other. I hardly saw a phone in a hand all evening. Isn’t that wonderful? It seems that Frances creates an environment that encourages connection.

Running about with the camera, inside and outside Frances, I was able to eavesdrop on some of what people were saying about the food. I heard consistently positive things about the food and drinks, especially the cocktails. The cocktail bar is small, and cleverly put together. Alex, clearly in his element, crafts each drink with care and attention and delivers each with a smile that lights up the room. Frances care about what you put in your body, of course, and it’s lovely to see them care so much about who you interact with too.

Taking photos in a restaurant environment in the evenings is not as easy as it sounds. Cameras need a lot of light to work well, which makes things a little trickier as the sun goes down, especially in cosy, soothingly-lit indoor spaces. It takes planning and intentionality to get the right settings in-camera, a good amount of experience, and of course a powerful camera that performs well in such conditions. For some shots, I used an off-camera flash, but it’s also important not to disturb the clientele. Flashing lights going off all the time can be jarring and unpleasant in such a relaxing space.

I care about the experience from all angles, and I find ways to shoot the scene using the light that is available, and finding those fleeting moments that capture each individual for who they are. Light bends, light bounces, and if you’re lucky, you find light emitting from people themselves.

I love that.

📍 Go to Frances (Google Maps) & follow their Instagram.

🙏 Thank you Tina and Rickus for the invitation. I will be back soon!

Watch this video and let me know what you think.

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It’s obviously meant to be taken lightly, and to appeal to both clients of video professionals, and the video pros themselves. It’s a cheeky visual insight into something that affects almost all video pro - client relationships at some point.

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What point have you been trying to make? What’s the most vital piece of information that you want your clients to know? Have you been struggling to succeed in conveying this info, or are you lacking efficacy? The answer you’re after is, odds-on, video. Done intelligently, emotionally, memorably, video will utterly redefine your success metrics.

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I want you to think about what video could do for you, and leave a comment to tell me your idea. I’ll reply with honest feedback, tips, suggestions, and perhaps even encouragement. If you’d rather chat privately, send me a message.

Nope.

Watch this short video podcast I recorded and presented for Not Another Crypto Show, which never really took off, but was a fun show to work on regardless. Here’s the video:

There’s no reason that you couldn’t re-design the sound of your vlogs and release them as podcast episodes.

There’s no reason that you couldn’t do street interviews, event interviews “Billy On The Street” style, or making use of any other opportunity that comes your way to make sure you are getting the audio clips that help you communicate your feelings, thoughts, and passions.

Here’s an episode of Music Appreciated, the music podcast I am feeling out at the moment. This episode was recorded with Takura Terry and Manu Bhande, at La Cantina, Stanford, South Africa, after a performance. On-the-fly, they agreed, and I went for it. Seize-the-moment style. I’m not even on camera for this one. Check it out:

The other musicians, “gate crashing,” the interview work well for this style of show, and really communicate the chaos that is performing live. I rolled with it, and it turned out to be a good thing that I did.

Neither of these episodes follow “The Formula,” and I love them both.

How will you do your show?

How will you show your originality?

How will you stand out from the crowd?

Reach out if you want my help with your podcast: YVCreator.com

Video Pods Do Better

Helen Norbury’s show Becoming Unapologetically Me is a polarising and challenging show that takes a long hard look at society and our place within it. Helen was over the moon that her YouTube Short hit 4K views on the following Short alone, which helped drive traffic to the audio version of the show, and get some new eyes and ears on her message. Check that short out here.

In Future Articles, I will be discussing:

• How a video podcast strategy gives AI crawlers the minerals they need to see you as a thought leader and trusted industry voice.

• How a video podcast strategy trickles down in to a healthy and manageable content tree that feeds in to your purpose and flow.

• How a video podcast can help you to teach, explain, lead, and guide better.

Straight past, no glance. “Not even a f++k you,” as my Nan used to say. No acknowledgement, no notice. No visit, no invite. You offer, but always, “next time.”

Not listening, knows better. Ignorance of ignorance. Babies thrown out when the tub needs a clean. No understanding. No connection. You explain. Fruitless.

Free Will and Transparent Meanings

That’s just who they are. That’s just what they’re like. That’s just what they do. They’ve always been this way. They’re all like that. It happens all the time with them.

It’s not that they’re not interested, they’re just busy. It’s not that, “being right,” is more important than your relationship, they’re just proud people. It’s not that they look down on you and your choices, they just think everything you do is a mistake. It’s not that they don’t want you around, it’s just still not a good time, because there’s a lot going on.

Fuck off. And no, I didn’t bleep that one, because I mean it with my full chest. I, for one, am fucking exhausted to the core of my weary fucking soul of trying to support, help, or even just get along with people who don’t try to do the same with me. I have energetic wounds all down my arms from reaching out, only to be beaten back by bullshit. The fact is…

That’s not who they are. That’s not what they’re like. That’s not what they do. They haven’t always been this way, and honestly aren’t this way now. They’re not all like that. It doesn’t happen all the time with them.

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It is that they’re not interested, they’re not just busy. It’s is that, “being right,” is more important than your relationship, they’re not just proud people. It’s is that they look down on you and your choices, they don’t just think everything you do is a mistake. It is that they don’t want you around, it’s not about timing. There’s really not a lot going on.

They don’t choose you. You’re not the type of person they want to choose.

Exclusion, Disregard, and Cliquing

People choose the people they want to be around. That’s just true. You don’t get a say in what people feel is worth their time. The way people communicate this choice is what causes the most harm.

Cliquing is herding for humans. It’s why we have weedy sayings like, “Birds of a feather flock together.” We group ourselves, and that’s pretty natural for the human race. It’s also natural for animals.

Exclusion happens when someone, or a group of people, choose not to allow another person, or group of people, into their clique. Exclusion can be active, or passive. Active exclusion is when you are direct and open about your preferences. Passive exclusion is when you ghost people, leave them on read, or otherwise disregard them, hoping that they’ll eventually “Get the message,” and drop off.

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Disregard is when someone makes another person feel like they don’t matter by totally ignoring them, their needs, their efforts, their importance, and so on. It’s a form of abuse, sometimes, and it is also a survival instinct at other times. It’s a form of abuse when it is used to purposefully cause hurt or belittlement. It’s survival when it’s used to dissociate from the existence of a past abuser, for the purposes of self-preservation and healing.

It is okay to have cliques. It is okay to exclude people from your life experience. Even diregard is okay if it’s for healthy reasons.

Aside from scenarios of survival, it’s not okay to say one thing when you mean another. It’s not “self-assurance,” if you are hiding in subterfuge. If you claim to want someone around, it’s not okay to continually turn your back on them until they break and quit trying.

Othering, Ownership, and Openness

Self-assurance is wonderful, beautiful, and necessary. The other side of self-assurance is honesty. If you prefer your sandwich cut diagonally, ask for that. If you’d prefer to have your martini stirred, ask for that. If you’d prefer to be left alone for a bit so you can recuperate, ask for that. If you would prefer not to have a particular person in your life, ask for that.

Othering is when you labour the points of difference between you and someone else, and use those differences to belittle, look down on, and otherwise besmirch a person’s character, self-image, or appearance. Othering is a malicious and vicious form of exclusion that does not ease the pain of separation. Instead, it deepens it.

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Ownership is often the opposite of othering. Ownership may have similar preferences, similar desires, similar values, and similar attributes. Ownership differs in its link to honesty.

Openness is achieved by saying what you want, by being honest about who you want in your life, and by actively standing in your truth so that your whole self can be seen, understood, and known.

If you have a cousin who doesn’t fit your lifestyle, and you don’t want them around, say so. If you have a parent who was or is abusive, and you wish to distance yourself from them, say so. If you have a partner that you honestly just don’t love or want anymore, say so. If you need a break, if you need distance, if you need peace, say so.

Everyone deserves to give themselves the gift of honesty. Be real, be clear, be you.

Actions Speak Louder. Then Words…

You can say that you want me there, but if you don’t visit when I am, your actions are saying that you don’t want me there.

You can say that you love me, but if you don’t honour me for who I am, your actions are saying that you don’t love me.

You can say that you will visit me here, but if you don’t visit when you’re nearby, your actions are saying that you don’t want to visit me.

You can say that you want me at your event to support you, but if you ignore me when I ask for details, your actions are saying that you don’t want me there.

You can say whatever you want, but if you don’t live up to what you say, your actions are saying the opposite.

IIWII, TINICDAIN

Humans are not courageous. Humans are ninnies. They’re unlikely to be brave or self-assured enough to actually be honest, or tell you how they really feel about you. They’ll instead opt for hurtful, passive, confusing, mean-spirited, and vindictive behaviour to repel you instead of just having the bottle to say, “Go away from me.”

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IIWII will be my next tattoo. It’ll be somewhere I have to look at everyday. “It Is What It Is.” And you know, it is. That’s exactly what it is. I cannot change the world, I can only change how I move through the world.

TINICDAIN will be the tattoo after that. It’ll be across my fucking heart because that is exactly what it protects. “There Is Nothing I Can Do About It Now,” is an agency-correcting reminder that you are you, I am me, and the fates are the fates.

Remembering these will keep you from chewing both of your own feet off serving the wrong people, and still hobbling after them on stumps in case they need anything else.

Integrating these will stop you from destroying your own self worth when you fall short of pleasing everyone in your life to the same extent. You cannot do it. Impossible.

Walk Away, Jog On, Beat It, Shove Off

Humans have over 7,000 languages, and each has a plethora of it’s own was to communicate a vital, empowering human sentiment, “Get the fuck out of my life.”

Said to you, it can hurt for awhile, but at least you know where you stand with that person. There’s no ambiguity, and you don’t have to keep making empty efforts that drain you over time.

Said to others, it can hurt them for awhile, but at least they know where they stand with you. You have told them that you prefer a life without them, and you’ve not wasted their time or energy.

If you have someone that you need shot of, have the self-respect, and the human decency to tell them. Be specific about your boundaries, and expect them to honour that. Then, you need to honour others any time they wish to be shot of you. That’s healthy, that’s self-assurance, and that’s nature.

Being able to be there when a father’s look of pride is shining, or when a mother’s glow for her children is in full effect… that’s a good feeling for me. I have lost enough people, been through enough pain, and seen enough tragedy to know that we need these reassurances, these milestone memories, to keep us grounded in our foundations when the world gives us a shake.

We can’t see everything, feel everything, notice everything all at once in the moment. It’s impossible. We’d need three heads and another one to reconcile them with each other. When we have to be away for awhile, we can forget the way our family smiles at us. We can feel separated from that warmth. We can get lost. Life is a lot to deal with, whoever you are. Having a keepsake of stability is a beautiful thing. Something you can always look back on, remember in your heart, and maybe even feel the glimmer of that warmth again.

I want to do a photoshoot with you, and I want to highlight who you are. There are so many photographers out there you could choose from, and this is why you would choose me. Realness.

Interested? Pop over to the website and get in touch!

Everyone bottles it

Even the most confident, most talented, most charismatic, and most perfection-obsessed humans among us will f++k it up from time to time. Nobody is immune to human foibles. Nobody has “got it together,” in every moment of their lives.

Humans have moods, struggles, internal dialogues, hormones, opps, insecurities, and traumas just to name a few. SO many factors plump up our self doubt. Hopefully, you’re already working on being kinder, more allowing, and more understanding towards yourself, and expecting less perfection. That’s the best first step.

Allow yourself to be what you are… a human who is figuring the world out as you move through it.

Start in private, then roam a little

Younger generations may find it easier to publicly film themselves wherever they are, but even they have doubts and insecurities. Anyone who is over 35 today grew up in a smartphone-less world until roughly the age of 12. It’s not in our DNA like people who have always been around them. “Oldies” like myself (37) had to really work to get past the solid wall of self-doubt and paranoia that we came pre-loaded with.

Whatever your age, however you feel, wherever you are… start small. You’ve heard of “baby steps,” right? Do that. Start recording yourself alone, in your bedroom. When you feel comfortable, record yourself in your living room or kitchen. As your camera-shyness slowly decreases, you may try to record yourself in the yard, a quiet outdoor space, or in a parking structure. These places feel less public than the high street, and can be used to great effect as a middle space for comfort expansion.

When you feel ready, you’ll move on to recording yourself when you’re alone on a train or a bus. One day, you may be still recording when you reach your destination. You might feel braver than usual that day and keep rolling, and take your first step in to recording yourself in front of other people. A few at a time, one moment at a time, slowly, slowly, slowly.

Once one wall falls, the rest follow

You’re basically doing exposure therapy on yourself in a controlled, calming, and un-pressured way. You’re allowing yourself to acclimatise to the feeling of talking to the camera while being aware of your surroundings. You’re allowing yourself to build foundations before you start building the rest of the structure.

When you take that first step of recording in semi-public, it might feel so weird. I know it did for me, at first. I soon realised that people don’t care what you do, really, as long as you’re not causing anyone any harm.

Also… people lowkey admire you for it. We’ve all been bullied and judged and diminished by someone in our lives. We all know what that feels like, and most of us don’t like it. When we see someone doing something courageous or adventurous, of course we feel a little “less than,” sometimes, which can make some of us say or do some mean things.

Most of the time though, we’re impressed. We feel like this human must be more, “okay,” than others, better put together, and better integrated. We are fascinated by their ability to shake off the inherent humiliation we begin to feel just by being alive in this world.

You are not broken and you can do this

Some of you will struggle more than others, and that’s okay. Most people throw balls better than I do, and that’s okay too. Humanity works because we all need each other and we all have something unique to share. That uniqueness and life experience that you’ve honed over the years is what makes you and your content more compelling than anyone else’s.

The trophy is to those who are brave enough to show up as their real selves, their true selves, every time they show up.

It takes work.

It takes time.

It takes you.

How do you deal with your stage fright, camera fright, self-doubt, or imposter syndrome?

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But there’s something that sets great hosts ahead of the hundreds of mediocre ones…

What is your role as a host? Why are you there?

If you say, “To host the show,” or “To ask questions,” you can get out of the classroom right now and go back to Podcasting 101.

This isn’t it:

So many hosts think their job is to thumbsuck and parrot off as many questions as possible. They think need to rigidly stick to their list of questions, or their predetermined agenda. They’re so concerned about being a good host that they stop being good listeners. Some of them never were good listeners to begin with. That’s the thing about podcasting, interviewing people, or just having a conversation with another human. We need to listen better than we speak.

This is:

You’re not a question-firing machine. You’re not a data-extraction device. You are a human being with a particular set of interests, talking to other human beings who share that set of interests. You are first and foremost, a person talking to a person in real time. That person deserves your full, undivided attention.

So many hosts, in their intros, say some banal variation of, “It’s great to connect with you today…” yet they don’t actually connect with the other person.

It’s a hollow listen, for your audience. It’s boring, predictable, and frankly, it sucks. You’re not there just to ask questions. You’re there to drill down. Go deeper.

It’s a connection, not a competition

Hosts misunderstand the point of having pre-prepared questions. They’re not there for you to adhere to like your life depends on it. Your questions are there to give you inspiration for when the conversation starts to dry up. Ideally, you will research your guest, and learn more about them than your audience knows. Or really, what’s the point of you?

Anyone can pull people up on social media and Wikipedia… that’s not impressive, it’s not helpful, it’s not insightful. It’s just lazy. You’re not vying for attention and airtime. You’re supplying it. You’re not the Co-Star of the conversation, you’re the canvas. Let your guest “paint.”

It’s an adventure, not an advertisement

Conversation is an art and a muscle. It’s something you can develop, get creative with, and do better at with practise. You develop your conversational skills as you have more interactions with people, and yet we utterly screw it all up on a daily basis.

You are not the star

This is not an audition, and you’re not the main focus, as host. Yes it is your show, but it is absolutely not all about you. You’re the enabler of the conversation, not the topic. You’re the holder of the space, not the filling. You should not be selling yourself, promoting yourself, or talking about yourself in excess. Yes, people want to get to know you… but not all at once.

Imagine you meet someone for the first time at a party, or perhaps on a first date. They’re attractive, they’re new, they grab your interest. Then they start talking about themselves and never stop. When you do manage to get a word in, their reply always swings the focus back to them and their experiences. You realise they’re just there to brag. They have no interest in finding out what you’re actually like.

You’d hate that. And so would your audience if you behaved this way on your podcast.

So what should I do??

You’ve either invited a particular guest because they’re an easy book for your show and you need people to fill out your guest slots…

OR

You’ve invited a human being to come and talk to you about a mutual interest, a shared belief system, or perhaps because they offer a wholly different viewpoint to your own.

Which seems more likely to make for a compelling episode?

The former shoehorns anybody into the guest schedule because you have a show and need to release an episode this week.

The latter allows for real opportunities to connect and open up. It builds a bridge of intentionality and purpose for you and your guest to stand. on together.

Do that. Be deliberate, be open, and be humble, for crying out loud.

How to manage questions

Your questions are like having a chocolate bar after dinner. Nice to have as an option, sure, but not exactly crucial for sustenance. Compared to connection and flow, your questions don’t matter at all. When you place listening at the core of how you host your show, your questions become nothing more than social lubricant for when things get sticky.

Here’s how to think about it, step by step:

1. Invite your guest because they are compelling, insightful, or otherwise aligned with your intention. This will make it so much easier to listen like you actually care.

2. Thoroughly research your guest, and learn more about them than any other host or interviewer ever has. This does not mean just asking an LLM to fart out your work for you. Use it as a starting point, and then go deeper.

3. Organize your questions into two lists:

   1. The first list is limited to 3 questions maximum. This is where you list the most pressing questions, the hardest-hitters, the real reason you chose this particular guest.

   2. The second list is everything else, loosely sorted into categories for easy referencing on-the-fly. This is where you put questions that can save the conversation in a lull.

4. Now use those two lists to your advantage to keep you focused on your true purpose and real intention behind this conversation, the intention you set before you even sent the invitation.

   1. Use a main-list question to start the conversation, and really listen to the response from your guest. What did they say that piqued your interest? What can you ask more about? What can you dive deeper into? What might your guests be wondering after hearing that?

   2. Ask your next question based on the guest’s answer, not your question list. Your question lists are only there for reference and to keep you on-topic. Stay curious about what the guest is saying right now and follow up on what you heard.

Realign yourself

It is simple as that on paper, but in practise, you’re going to be fighting your lack of training, your whims, your nerves, and so many more distractions that are all trying to pry you away from your true purpose: to be a sounding board and a listener, to be an enabler of knowledge transfer. That is your job as a host.

More Podcast Help:

• 🎙️ Be A Better Host - Part 1: Proper Prep

• 🎙️ Be A Better Podcast Host - Part 2: Listen Properly (A Very Deep Dive)

• 🎙️ Podcasting Is Easy & SO HARD

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I have a very long patience fuse, and it seems to grow every day. I am actively working on it, and I’m making great progress.

People close to me, and my longest-standing clients, will at some point have heard this phrase escape my lips. It’s usually delivered with a breathless disbelief, and it is almost always directed at tech or SaaS products.

Occasionally, though, I say it to people as well.

Sometimes it seems like certain humans are hell-bent on backward behaviour, unhelpful statements, or malicious incompetence. It’s that last one that is most prevalent and most unappealing to me.

• When someone is being a pain in the arris on purpose, I’ll say this.

• When someone is going out of their way to be difficult, I’ll say this.

• When someone is trying their best to be an obstacle to progress, I’ll say this.

It’s sincere, it’s direct, and it gently calls out undesirable behaviour or that which is incompatible with achieving our mutual goals.

“Please don’t irritate me.”

It must feel incredible, flying along on such minimal kit. I can’t imagine it. I also can’t imagine myself having this level of trust in my equipment. I am rather afraid of heights. Climbing the Cologne Cathedral made me sweat, swear, and swoon, and that was a closed staircase. I don’t like it. I would absolutely do it again though. 100% worth it.

I’m getting away from my point. The flying folk.

That’s a tent, they’re using. I know it’s an aerodynamic tent and it’s probably very durable. It’s not for me. I’d rather stand on the sidelines and shoot them as they go. Sony’s 24-70 GM was what I had on me for the day. I’d like to get back up the mountain with a 70-200 or a 200-600 F2.8. That’s next.

If YOU are a person who does things like this, or you do some other unconventional sport, I want to shoot you repeatedly while you do it.

“Thanks, Jeff, super helpful, really clear. Aren’t you funny? Piss off,” I hear you screaming in rage.

That’s fine. Now that you’ve crashed out happily, read that again, with footage in mind.

I tell everyone:

• RAW footage is better.

• Unf###ed with footage is better.

• Straight off the memory card and directly to me.

“Why though?”

Aren’t you a Curious Cathy today? Lord. Fine, I’ll tell you.

Stop Fiddling With It!

Some people think that they’re saving time & money by doing some of the editing themselves first. You aren’t making anything easier for me, and you’re not making anything cheaper for yourself either. You’re just complicating matters. The tools you use are likely not of a high enough standard to non-destructively edit your footage, leaving me mopping up after the low-end kit you’re using to edit.

RAW Formats are Best

The tools I use get superpowers when I get to work with RAW footage straight from a decent camera. If you want me to pass out with happiness, send me Blackmagic Raw (BRAW), Apple Prores, REDCODE (.R3D), Arri Raw (.ARI), Sony Raw (.MXF), Canon Cinema Raw, or similar formats. I can do so much with these!

Don’t Have Raw?

Okay. Send me what you have. Don’t clip it, trim it, edit it, or muck about with it in any way whatsoever at all ever. Just send it to me in it’s most natural state possible. Upload it from your phone if that’s what you shot with (totally acceptable, btw), yank it off the memory card if it’s a real camera, and upload it to me. Do not do anything else.

But The Footage Is So Shaky!

I promise you, I have spent way more money than you have on tools that fix that issue beautifully, and I have spent a hell of a lot more time and energy building the necessary experience to weild these marvellous weapons. All you’re going to do, is make everything worse (and more expensive to fix). I told you… I like them wriggling!

How Do I Send Files?

This used to be a super simple answer, and it’s become a little more nuanced with the commoditisation of data and the proliferation of AI crawlers out there.

❌ WeTransfer

WeTransfer have recently updated their Terms & Conditions, and are now irredeemably doomed to be avoided by wise creators.

Here are some snippets:

• ‘You hereby grant us a perpetual, worldwide, non-exclusive, royalty free, transferable, sub-licensable license to use your content’......

• ‘Such license includes the right to reproduce, distribute, modify, prepare derivative works’....

See? Bugger that, and bugger them. Moving on.

❌ Google Drive

Google has killed their Security Sandbox and the fallout is yet to be fully realised. This s###move has decimated their userbase’s trust, and many are wondering if they need to move to a different, more secure browser. We no longer have confidence in the security of Google Drive, and many other Google services as well.

✅ Dropbox

Ugh. Okay. Use it, but I don’t like it. The UI bugs me, and it can be super buggy.

✅ SwissTransfer

Apparently more secure and allows for bigger transfers per use than most other services. SwissTransfer is one that I have used a few times with clients, and it’s been easy. No worries.

✅ Smash

Muuuuuuch smaller transfers than SwissTransfer, Smash also allegedly has better security and claim “No AI Training",” front and centre on their website. I haven’t used this one myself, yet. Tread carefully.

What Else Do You Need?

No, really, I want to know what you don’t understand.

• I want to help you

• I don’t believe in “Stupid Questions”

HMU. Drop a comment. Let’s talk.

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They’ll procrastinate full days away, doom-scrolling, day-dreaming, and doing their very best to be very vacant. When they know they’re making the wrong decisions, they’ll think of a thousand grey areas, a ton of excuses, and any justification possible to make them feel better about screwing up knowingly.

They’re not helping themselves, and the attitude is pretty self-defeating.

The alternative sets you up for a future that stays within your control more than you ever thought possible. The alternative builds you up, instead of breaking you down. The alternative, is to not bullshit yourself.

You’ll read this, and then you’ll carry on doing it anyway.

As my father in law famously says…

“You must know what you want to do.”

You don’t have to become a super-rigid, over-planning, anal-retentive bore. Just don’t mug yourself. You’re the only asshole who has to live your life. Everyone else can escape the consequences of your actions. You can’t.

Sorry, buddeh. Do it for yourself. Or don’t.

My wife feels the same. There’s a nurturing energy, and a peaceful way that animals have about them that we have never experienced in other humans. Animals just have another thing about them and this is it.

This seal hollered at me not to come to close and I listened to it. That calmed it down massively and I think we both benefitted from it. When you’re sneaking up on stuff with your camera, be sure to listen for cues so you know what to do. You’re in their territory, after all.

Wouldn’t it be nice if people were this transparent?

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Of course you would.

Better

Real life is better than film

Film is better than digital

Digital is better than AI

AI is better than nothing

( )

What is this reductive bollocks?

It’s reductive bollocks, this reductive bollocks. It’s a guideline, not a commandment. It’s a reminder of our humanity and purpose, not a demonisation. Calmensie down. I’ll explain.

Real life is better than film

It’s fun to muck about recording videos, and it used to be a whole lot more fun. Back when cameras were new, expectations were low, and everyone’s parents had a lens pointed at their children. Home video days were great. Film cinema days were greater still. There’s something ridiculous about burning chemicals with light and watching real life back later. A strip of chemically treated plastic brought us all immense immersion in worlds we could previously only imagine. Then some cleverboots decided we should burn light temporarily into a sensor instead, and digital photography came knocking.

Why is it better?

Real life, real memory, real emotion. That’s better than any reproduction will ever be. No matter how stunning the footage you can take is, immersing yourself in the actual real moment is incomparable. It’s something humanity has become scared of, living with no distraction. People talk about rawdogging flights and car rides - a phenomenon where you just experience the moment without tech distractions of any kind. That used to just be called living.

Film is better than digital

Videography legends like Roxy Facer absolutely hero film work, and they do it so well. I haven’t used film video cameras before personally, but I would love to give it a try someday.

@roxyfacerbut would love to see the attempts #filmtoker #bolexh16 #kodakfilm #16mm

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Before that video, I had never encountered the word Bolex at all. I love learning new things like this. I like cameras, and I love my Pentax SuperME film camera. It’s pretty small, 35mm, and pretty idiot-proof. It offers a change from my main rig, a mirrorless camera.

It’s the one I take to shoots, races, events, and everything in between. It’s a hybrid camera which lets me shoot really high quality video, or photos at the flick of a switch. It can be built up for video work, and slimmed down for trackside days in the sun.

So isn’t digital better?

I mean, it is and it isn’t, really. If you want super cripsy lines and you like the digital look, then digital is fab. You’ll love it. If you want the creamy, dreamy, nostalgic feel that you can really only get from film, and you have the money to spend, then film is absolutely your way forward. It’s still relevant, still powerful, still sought after in 2025.

Another big switch came with the introduction and continued improvements of AI.

Digital is better than AI

People are already getting pretty sick of AI slop. There’s a hoard of it on the internet and it’s pissing people off. Well-known creators have been losing followers lately because they’re using too much AI-generated content in their work. The public tolerance for AI generated content is thinning. The respect for human-created content is back on the rise. There’s a hunger for real people, real connection, real experiences, and real content.

AI is great for people who don’t have the money for real creations, or who don’t feel the need to create from scratch to get their message across.

Then, isn’t AI better?

Again, it’s a question of use-cases. If you have the money and you have the vision, then I believe you should still be hiring videographers and creators to make your videos digitally for you. If you haven’t quite made it yet, and have a baby budget, then AI is a wonderful solution for you. Just do your research into the environmental impacts your favourite AI tool is having on the world, and see if there’s a way to create in a cleaner, more globally sustainable way. Reckless AI generations cost real-world resources. We should be mindful of that.

And if you’re not convinced, don’t use it. However…

AI is better than nothing

AI generated content is fine, honestly. Sure, people are getting tired of it, but it’s better than never putting out any marketing content at all. You’ll get left behind. Ignored. You’ll become irrelevant. Right? That’s what the marketing says so it must be true. Or something.

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